The reality is, those of us who are over achievers, who are constantly trying to ‘improve and be better,’ who are spiritual seekers to the point of exhausting ourselves - never feeling good enough, worthy or safe to rest - are the exact mirror of those of us who feel rebellious, lazy, unmotivated and like we procrastinate.
These are both symptoms of having learned in our childhood that our worlds are dictated by others.
Over achievers who burn themselves out and push themselves past the brink over and over are looking to FINALLY be ‘good enough’ so that they will be loved, thinking this is what will make them happy and safe.
Those who self sabotage, rebel and procrastinate learned that those in authority want BAD things for them, or that following those in positions of authority only lead to PAIN - and thus rebelling was a BETTER option.
Both cases are us not understand how to SELF regulate. How to move from an adult perspective that is BEYOND shame/guilt/approval/doing the opposite of what we were told - into a state of learning for YOURSELF what feels good and bad/what is RIGHT or WRONG FOR YOU - and how to live in alignment with that.
The work here is to love the inner child enough that they feel safe to find REALITY - rather than trying to be pleasing or having to rebel from the learned trauma that to go along equals pain.
Let's dive in to figure out how we can do this.