Breaking out of the 'Matrix' is no easy task.
It is pervasive. It is everywhere you look. Pretty well all the messages that you hear and otherwise absorb during the course of your day come from the system that currently 'runs' the world.
The system that is profiting heavily on a society that feels not good enough. That feels that they lack something - are always lacking something. Which in turn, makes them excellent consumers. The news, magazines and t.v. shows feed this message to you, education, medicine, politics, religion, and pretty well every other system that is in place right now is dependent upon your lack of self worth and self knowledge
By now, this is absolutely nothing new to you. You know this game and you are most likely already working to free yourself of it.
You have begun to work to let go of physical attachments. To let yourself rise above the idea that you are the brand you wear, the tax bracket you are in, the company you keep. You have probably at least been made totally aware that none of these external things that you could acquire are actually going to grant you the happiness and inner peace that you are looking for.
You have started pursuing personal growth and personal development work, because you are now wise to the idea that the source of how you are feeling and what needs to shift is all internal. You know that fixing your outer world isn’t going to yield the results you are looking for, that your internal shifts are where the gold is.
You are now working diligently to become more peaceful. Loving. Spiritual. Kind. Generous. Non-attached. Which is all awesome.
However.
The Trap Of Personal Growth
You may now see that this mindset of ‘not enougness’ is so ingrained in your way of being that you have carried it over into your personal development/spirituality practices too.
You may be starting to wake up to the idea that while you may no longer be striving for external status to make you feel like enough, you are still striving for an internal shift, and internal change that will make you good enough. That will make you worthy of love.
You are not doing your inner work from a place of knowing you are already perfect, and you simply want to live in that truth.
You are doing your inner work because you still think there is something broken in you that needs fixing.
And there is a big difference between those two states.
To do personal growth work from a place of already knowing you are perfect, looks very different from doing personal growth work from a place of simply transplanting the deficiency from the external to the internal.
In this, you are still withholding love, approval and acceptance from yourself. You are still not allowing yourself to be joyful, happy, contented and peaceful in the here and now.
Because you are not ‘there’ yet.
You are not enlightened enough yet.
Not peaceful enough yet.
Not kind enough.
Not self aware enough.
You still have triggers and ‘bad habits’ and ‘shadow’ and ‘ego’ – and all of these things must be rectified before you are allowed to feel good.
Before you are allowed to approve of yourself.
Before you are allowed to be happy.
Before you are allowed to feel good enough.
You see how this is no different from the external matrix trap that everyone else is caught up in?
The point is this:
Do not withhold love from yourself.
Ever.
For any reason.
And when you feel yourself pulling back from life, pulling back from pleasure, pulling back from allowing yourself to be happy – pause and reflect. Is this really personal growth, or is this just the matrix thinking that has nothing to do with real truth?
You see, the way to break out of the Matrix is actually really quite simple when it is boiled down. Not easy, but simple.
All that is required is you standing up and saying ‘I am good enough just as I am, right here right now.”
All it takes is you starting to allow yourself to feel how you want to feel now. Allowing yourself to feel loved, worthy, respectable, connected.
Today.
Allowing yourself to take pleasure in your life. In your journey. Because there is still a journey to take. But the journey is not the proof that you are not good enough. That you are not ‘done’ yet. The journey is the adventure. It has nothing to do with your value.
In this, you must start to release the behaviors that come from a place of ‘when I do this, someone will love and validate me,’ and you start to validate yourself.
It is when you start standing in who you are, all of who you are, in this moment, with no apologies. Knowing that you are going to grow and learn and change, and that the ’future’ version of you is not the ‘better’ version of you. That the past versions of you were not ‘worse’ or ‘less enlightened’ versions of you.
Breaking out of the matrix is saying that the journey is not what is defining your being. That your being is already defined as whole, perfect and complete, and that this journey Is simply an experience that has NOTHING to do with WHAT you are. This journey is not a reflection OF you, it is an experience FOR you. That’s it.
Stepping Out Of The Matrix Is Just You Taking Your Power Back.
Fully.
It is you no longer looking outside for your power source, for love, for validation, for connection. It is you no longer looking AHEAD for these things either. It is you no longer putting conditions on your feeling good enough. It is you, giving yourself permission to be all that is, and the very specific expression that you are, all at once and making no apologies for it.
It is not very complicated – hidden in plain sight you might say. It may not be easy, and you may find that it feels like you fall into the trap of not enough-ness so much more than you were ever previously aware of – but that new awareness is curative. The second you recognize that you are making yourself small and less than, in that moment you have the power to turn the tide. In that instant you have the power to say – fuck that. I am enough. I am good enough. I am worthy of feeling how I want to feel. Now, how do I want to feel?
Then letting yourself feel that. Right here. Right now.
This may require that you do some digging into exactly ‘what’ you want to be feeling.
If you don’t know how you want to feel, if you don’t really know what you are searching for that is already within you, then take some time to really investigate the external things you are seeking.
What is it that you think you are going to feel when you get the perfect body? When you enter the perfect ‘twin flame’ relationship? When you are ‘living your purpose?’ When you are enlightened? When you are able to be peace and love and light all the time?
Look deeply at the conditions you have placed on your enough-ness, and investigate the feeling state you believe those accomplishments are going to allow you.
Spend serious time contemplating arriving at your goal. Visualize it. Feel it. Notice how arriving at this place would sound, taste and smell. Notice what it would physically feel like, mentally feel like, and emotionally feel like.
Then live from that place now.
Tune into that feeling as often as possible, then live as though it is.
Because it is.
The only one that needs to be convinced of it, is you.
And you convince yourself by living it.
You are already enough. Your journey is not the sign that you have deficiency to make up. The journey is an adventure.
So no more playing small. No more withholding happiness. No more withholding joy and peace.
You are it. Right here, right now.
And you always have been.
<3
