As we walk our self love path, we are going to start to realize that this journey isn't always 'all about us.'
We're going to realize that as we do the work of learning to have compassion and curiosity for ourselves, to discover our true needs, to realize what's really hurting us vs. what we think is 'wrong' with us - that we aren't actually broken, inherently flawed or otherwise in need of fixing - but that a LOT of our pain and struggle is stemming from trying to live in a system that is inherently inhumane.
The reality is, all of us have been conditioned to accept that what we have as 'normal' - what is considered a normal way to work, to eat, to live, to relate to one another, to strive for, to value and to BE - is the way things SHOULD be. We have been conditioned to believe that any part of ourselves that don't fit into this normal, that don't feel good within this normal and that aren't able to function without pain and struggle in this normal are 'bad parts' of us, that we need to fix/change/alter.
We live in a world where we all walk around with immense shame, guilt and self blame whenever we feel pain or can't get ourselves to measure up to 'normal' - and this is actually something that keeps us trapped in the very conditions that are causing us our distress.
Many of us have an inkling that what we are living in isn't quite right - but at the end of the day we have a really hard time really SEEING what's messed up and getting to a place where we can address the root cause of our pain - because we are lost in our shame, guilt, self blame and all the self fixing that goes along with that.
We are being distracted over and over again by what I call 'manufactured discontent' - feeling like our pain is always caused by a lack within us - and this is blocking us from seeing what's really going on and what we really need to feel better.
With that, we have to realize that letting go of shame and guilt is actually really hard. Most of us are afraid that if we DON'T listen to our shame and guilt stories, that this is going to drive us into a state where we ruin our whole lives, hurt everyone around us and become 'bad people.' We are so convinced that if we aren't in a state of trying to fix and improve ourselves that this will lead to us being alone forever without any hope of ever being happy or safe again.
And this is how we stay stuck.
Today we are going to break all of this down so we can find our power.
Shame and guilt are keeping us trapped in a system that's not working for us - and it's causing us to blame ourselves for our REACTIONS to the system instead of seeing the actual cause of our pain.
When we get past shame and guilt, we're going to find deep wisdom - but getting there is hard and that's what we're going to explore today.
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