Many of us struggle with 'perfectionism'.
This feeling that there is an ever present 'judge' of our behavior, appearance, performance and lifestyle that we must measure up to in order to be safe, worthy of love, good enough or otherwise ok.
Sometimes we can pin-point who/what we are trying to be perfect for - coworkers, friends, significant others - and we can recognize that we are trying to live up to either real or perceived expectations in order to be approved of, loved or even just generally safe.
Sometimes we may take a step back and realize that this perfectionist tendency is more present in more than just our direct interactions with others, but rather comes from an internal sense that we have to be 'living right' by some standard that is a mix of childhood indoctrination, religious indoctrination, cultural indoctrination and a whole hodge-podge of ideals and projections that have been piled up on us for our entire lives.
Sometimes we feel like we have to constantly be in a state of productivity, 'doing good' and being good - even when no one is around and no one is watching.
Whatever the case is, if you feel like you're constantly in a state where you feel you need to perform, like your life isn't your own but is something you must 'do right', like you aren't safe to be yourself but rather feel like you're constantly trying to figure out what the people around you want/expect and like you can never just relax and be in your own space - then this video is for you.
Today we are going to unpack that feeling of needing to be perfect, where it likely comes from (the multitude of places), how we can start to love those parts of us that feel that they need to be perfect safe, and how we can begin to work our way towards feeling more comfortable in our own lives.
This is a big topic, and there's no one or simple 'solution' - but we can slowly shift our perspective and become more self supportive - and that's the purpose of todays video.
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