Does Identifying With Trauma/Negative Emotions Keep Us Stuck In Them?

Hello Friend!

If you've been in the spirituality/new age/self improvement spheres for a while, you may have come across that idea that part of what holds us in our suffering is the fact that we IDENTIFY with our pasts/traumas/experiences/personalities - to the point that we OWN our pain rather than allowing ourselves to work THROUGH our pain.

There is a theory out there that the more we OWN the experiences of being abused, not having what we needed, being ostracized or judged for who and what we were and the more we see these experiences and hurt parts of ourselves AS us, the less we're going to be able to learn from them and eventually 'move on' with our lives.

Many will say that we are victimizing ourselves when we replay our negative experiences over and over in our minds. That we are not seeing our own divine natures, the bigger picture of our lives, the spiritual reality of who and what we are when we focus too much on what happened to us or on how it's making us feel.

We're told here that the solution to is to stop see ourselves as victims, to stop owning the trauma, to stop identifying with our experiences as though they are WHO we are, so that we can grow and expand into seeing what there was to LEARN from what we went through, and so we can establish a connection to the strong, healed, healthy, happy version of ourselves that ALSO exist. We're told that to get out of loops of depression, coping, numbing, addiction, self sabotage we need to start identifying with a higher version of ourselves so that we can work towards embodying THAT being.

We're told that we can be addicted to and be choosing to wallow in our pain and negative emotions, and sometimes again we have to STOP identifying as depressed, anxious, traumatized, sad, hurting or hurt - and start identifying with new positive emotions. That again we can get 'addicted' to this negative state and THAT'S the reason we're stuck in it.

Today I want to take a fine toothed comb through all of it. I want to sort out what's fact in the above ideas, and what's fiction. I want to explore where identifying with our trauma can be something that holds us back, and on the flip side where constantly trying NOT to identify, constantly striving to see the bigger picture and never allowing ourselves to really EMBODY our pain can actually STOP us from healing. I have a 'running on broken legs' metaphor that I hope will help us understand where identification can be useful, and where learning to expand beyond identification with our pain is pertinent - and how BOTH of these states exist. I want to help us see where each idea has its PLACE and how we can figure out for ourselves where WE are at so we can use the tools being offered in their right time and space.

There's medicine in identification. There's medicine in seeing beyond. Everything has its time. Let's see where YOU'RE at so you can determine what will benefit YOU the most.

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