How To Release Striving

By October 24, 2014Uncategorized

Hello again Beautiful 🙂 In todays video I cover the exact steps you can take, starting right here in this moment, that will move out of resistance and into flow. If you are confused about what resistance is, or why you would want to move out of it, I explain it all in the video. For you watcher types, here it is for you:

For you reader types, here is what I covered!

What Is Resistance?

To get started, what exactly am I talking about when I say resistance? Essentially, "resistance" is a state you enter when you veer off of your true life path, and start resisting the natural 'flow' of life. wall

How Do I Know When I Am In Resistance?

Technically speaking, every video I have made up to this point has illustrated different ways we enter resistance. We have talked about entering a state of resistance through:

  • Adopting a false belief about yourself:  You may adopt the belief that you are only worth what you produce rather than being worthy simply for being.
  • Adopting a false belief about the universe: You may start believing that if life is trying to help you release something from your reality, letting go of that thing is going to be painful and awful, and thus you must use all your might to hold onto it rather than allowing it to flow away from you.
  • Repressing your emotions:  This happens when you start to live not ever processing your negative emotions, so that they never are allowed to show you why they are there and how they are helpful.
  • Denying your truth  This will look like you going down a road you know is not right for you, or does not feel good for you because of the expectations of others.
  • Striving to be 'better:'  This manifests as you constantly berating your self for being where you are, such as berating yourself because you are not eating healthier, because you are not meditating for longer, because you are not helping people enough rather than allowing yourself to accept where you are.

When you boil it down to basics, you can tell that you are in resistance when you chronically feel negative emotions. When your underlying feeling in life is one of anxiety, fear, rage, anger, depression or struggle. You know you are in resistance when you want to engage in self destructive habits like over eating, drinking, over spending or dangerous or harmful sexual relationships.

You know you are in resistance when you don't feel good!

** Special Note ** You are not in resistance when you feel sadness due to the loss of a loved one, or when you feel disappointed for doing poorly on an exam. That is a normal emotional response to the stimulus of life. True resistance is generally expressed as a low level, overarching sense of not feeling good that either does not seem to be specifically tied to any one thing OR is seemingly tied to most everything in your life. There is no clear 'this is what is causing my pain, and this is how I can move forward to a better state." You may not be able to stop and say "oh hey, I am in resistance right now" because most of us have not been trained to understand what resistance feels like. In fact, most of us are conditioned to believe that life is supposed to feel hard, is supposed to be a struggle. We have a cultural expectation that feeling negative emotions is something we should run and hide from by distracting ourselves (bring on the food, drugs, sex, technology, music, entertainment, news ect), or just live with because they are normal. distraction I am here to tell you that this is not true! You can live a life where you generally feel good. Where you are generally energetic and excited about your day. Where your most common emotional state is that of calm relaxation. That is what living in flow looks and feels like. Peace and excitement.

Why Would You Want To Release Resistance?

The biggest reason that you want to release resistance is not to make yourself a better person. It is not to make it so that you have more to offer the world. It is not to make you more spiritual, kinder, smarter, faster, stronger - it is not to make you more anything.

The truth is, you are already whole. Already perfect. Already everything you need to be.

you are perfect

By releasing resistance you are most certainly going to more easily connect with the 'all' of you that exists. It is true that you may then become more loving, more grounded and more inclined to offer more to those around you.

But the real point of releasing resistance and entering a state of flow is for you to start enjoying your life! It is for you!!

You DESERVE to move into a state of flow. You deserve to feel the peace and excitement. You deserve to experience all the positive emotions and experiences that come along with living your right life. It is not about self improvement. It is about self love. Plain and simple. Its not for anyone else. It is for you.

How To Release The Resistance:

So, now that you understand that resistance is not serving you, how do you move out of it? I have a four step process for you that you can employ TODAY to start moving yourself out of resistance, back into flow - back onto your path 🙂 Step 1: The first thing you must do is clearly see the situation for what it is: As Dr. Phil would say, I invite you to look at whatever area of your life you are striving, whatever area of your life you are suppressing, whatever area of your life that you are feeling terrible in and ask yourself: "How is this working for me, really?"

Honest look :)

Honest look 🙂

By taking a real and honest stock of how your striving, your false belief, your emotional repression is actually serving you is so important if you want to move away from it. Can you see how your pushing yourself for something that is not in alignment with where you are at right now is not actually moving you forward? Can you see that perhaps you have created a negative cycle for yourself? Can you see how holding onto negative beliefs about yourself and the world are actually setting you up to have negative experiences? Can you see how beating yourself up over your "negative" habit is not helping you move away from it at all? Step Two: Stop. Pause. See the larger picture of what you are doing: Allow this new awareness to flood your consciousness, and then allow yourself to just pause and be where you are in this moment. With all your feelings, all your thoughts, all your emotions. Create a notable pause for yourself to just collect how you are and who you are right now. Step Three: Breath. Send yourself love and compassion: This step is so important. By slowing your breath and sending yourself love and compassion you are going to instantly raise your vibration and interrupt yourself and the pattern you currently have going. I invite you to place your hands over your heart and tell yourself that you are loveable, perfect and whole in this moment. Continue to do this until you feel yourself relax. Allow yourself to fully integrate your own love and your slow breath. Remind yourself that you are enough, that you are whole and perfect and do not need to strive. Remind yourself that it is OK to believe what you believe, and that it would be OK to question your beliefs. Remind yourself that you are still a perfect, whole being, even with your self destructive habit. spring from self love Instead of beating yourself up for being where you are, LOVE yourself for where you are. Say the words to yourself that you would say to your best friend if they were in the same situation. Speak the words to yourself that you wish someone would speak to you in this moment. Step Four: Actively accept where you are. Then ask yourself what you would really, really like to do: Give yourself permission to stop driving, to stop pushing, to stop trying to be better. Send the message to your heart that you are sorry for pushing so hard, for rejecting yourself. Understand that you are where you are meant to be. Allow yourself to just consider that perhaps you don't have to do any better than you are doing. That you can trust yourself. bubble bath From here, I invite you to ask yourself what you would actually like to be doing? You may also frame it as "What would someone who loved themselves do right now?" What you really want  right now? What feels the most like ease? What is something you can do right now that will make you feel better in your heart? This is the truest next step on your path 🙂 As you consider what would really make you feel good, you are aligning fully with your perfect path. You are also moving yourself directly out of resistance, back into flow. Check in with your heart. If you are currently contemplating engaging in a self destructive habit, let yourself know that you can still do the behaviour if you want to, you just have to try doing something else first.

This Is Your New Foundation:

This practice is going to help you remove vibrational discord within yourself. It is also going to draw you to a state where you start to unify your own consciousness.

This is the practice of you removing the old foundations of self loathing, and building new foundations of self love. It may seem simple, but it is actually one of the most profound things you can do.

Every time you do this practice when you notice yourself feeling yourself slip into resistance ie. notice yourself slipping into a negative feeling state - you are creating new foundations that will totally and utterly transform your life. love foundation We will talk more about this in our next video/blog. For now, give this practice a go and let me know how it works for you! <3