Self Neutrality Over Self Love?

Hello Beauty!

Here's the deal.

Learning to truly love and accept who we are in this world where we've been SO heavily conditioned to reject and abandon ourselves is hard.

We've talked a lot around here about why this is the case - our brains and bodies are wired for self preservation and protection - and if there were parts of self that led to us getting rejected or abandoned by those around us in our formative years, we will have developed an existential fear of these parts. We would have learned on a very deep level that loving or even HAVING these parts was a danger to our survival because those we depended upon FOR survival didn't like these parts - and thus if we had them or expressed them this meant we would be abandoned or rejected and therefore left alone to suffer and die.

This sounds dramatic sometimes - but it's the truth of why so many of us never feel safe, never feel worthy, never feel good enough and feel like we CAN'T love ourselves how we are.

With this, we may be trying as hard as we can to learn to love, accept, embrace and express ALL parts of ourselves - only to find that the harder we try, the more fearful, anxious and self hating/fixing we become. We may find that no matter WHAT we do to try to shift our state from self hate to self love that we simply can't do it.

It doesn't feel safe to love certain parts. It feels like if we do we will never become our fullest selves. That we will never achieve what we want to achieve. That we will never be loved by anyone else and will be doomed to being alone forever. It may feel 100% impossible to love parts of self or all of ourselves because there feels like there's simply too much at stake.

If this is you, you may find that working towards self neutrality before attempting self love is a great step. It may be possible that learning to simply witness parts of yourself, to make room for them to exist and to practice seeing them without reacting to them is an entry point that makes way for genuine self love.

Today let's discuss where neutrality towards ourselves can be a great tool for expanding our ability to accept who we are, and where neutrality can take the pressure off of trying to LOVE all parts of self when that prospect feels way too hard and scary.