One of the most popular topics in the self help/spirituality/wellness world is that of codependency.
You can scroll all day long looking at countless posts about how to become more independent, how to stop being manipulative, how to stop needing others to be this or that so that you can be happy.
There’s so much discussion around what is and isn’t a healthy relationship dynamic - and with all of this there can be a LOT of confusion created around what is ACTUALLY healthy and what isn’t - because there are so many different opinions and offerings out there.
Should we have stronger boundaries? Do we need to learn to ask for help more? Is it ok to ‘need’ others sometimes? Where is the line between what’s truly interdependent and what’s unhealthy reliance?
With this, many of us are finding that we are struggling with our mental health, feeling depressed, isolated, unmotivated, like we are never being or doing enough, like there’s something wrong with us and so on, and many of us are struggling with self sabotage, coping mechanisms, ways that we numb and stimulate ourselves that we see as ‘bad habits’ that no matter what we do to try to resolve we can’t seem to get on top of.
Today, I want to offer the idea that the reason we struggle to find true balance in our relationships and the reason many of us have so many ‘bad habits’ and negative emotions we don’t know how to deal with, is because our culture is SO far from what an actual healthy, connected community looks like.
I want to explore the possibility that our codependence and our self sabotage/negative emotions are both stemming from living in a world where we don’t have a healthy model of relationships and how deeply this is actually affecting us.
There’s a larger context here that is being ignored, and I want to shine a light on it today.
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