Hello Gorgeous!
You've been told by the self love gurus that all of your scapegoats, addictions, self sabotage, coping mechanisms and 'bad habits' are rooted in needs you have that aren't being met.
You've been told that there's no bad part of you - that everything you are and everything you're doing is coming from a place of doing the best you can to survive in a world where you were programmed to believe things about yourself and reality that simply aren't true.
You've been told that guilt and shame are always lies, and that you're eternally innocent.
You've been told that when you're REALLY becoming self aware, you're going to see that the reason you're doing everything you are - no matter how harmful or 'bad' it may seem - is to keep yourself safe in some way.
And you really want to believe all of this. You really want to discover what you actually need so you can shift your behaviors in a healthier direction. You really WANT to support yourself in living a life that aligns with who you are and what works for you. You really WANT to see your innocence and find this self love that everyone is talking about.
The only problem? When you go in and start asking yourself what you need, why you're doing what you're doing, why you're in pain, what your programs are or any other question of the sort - all you see is your brokenness. All you see are your mistakes. All you see is that you're failing and doing bad and can't figure things out. All you see is that you're causing all your own problems and just need to get your shit together. All you see is that what everyone said about you - how incapable, stupid, shameful, bad, wrong, disappointing and in need of fixing you are.
You want to find the truth, but it seems like the truth is that you suck. You SHOULD feel shame. You should feel guilt. You are broken and doing things wrong.
Today, I'm going to talk about why our shame and guilt stories are going to come up the strongest when we are starting our questioning work. Why attempting to have compassion for ourselves, attempting to discover our needs, attempting to go deeper than our conditioned stories is actually going to TRIGGER our WORST shame and guilt narratives, and how we can prepare for this and work THROUGH it.
I promise you, your shame and guilt stories aren't true. They are flaring up for a reason (they are trying to protect you from change!) and I want to give you some tools so that you can work WITH this inevitable flare up.
This is normal and there's nothing wrong with you.
<3
