Hello Friend!
For SO many of us, we have blocks in our capacity to show up as the people we know we are, blocks in our ability to create the lives we want to create, blocks in our relationships we can't quite figure out and blocks in our thinking that we can't seem to push past/don't even really NOTICE.
Most importantly, many of us live our lives with a constant feeling of guilt/shame/like we're not doing the 'right thing.' No matter what we do, we feel like we're messing up in some way.
Many of us have a sense of who we're 'supposed to be' and have an idea of what's authentic for us - but the more we pursue living as this person, the more we feel riddled with doubt and impostor syndrome-like feelings.
Many of us are doing what we've been told we have to do, should do, what we've been told will make us good/right/successful - and are continually finding that we feel anxiety, depression, resistance and a deep sense of dissatisfaction OR that we're constantly sabotaging our own efforts to be and do what we think is the right thing to be and do.
Many of us have issues in our lives where we KNOW the next right step we need to take - what would truly help us move forward in a way we've never moved forward before - but we just can't make ourselves take the step. We can't do it. Our bodies and minds rebel SO HARD any time we attempt to change our patterns.
And we have NO idea where all this is coming from. We don't know why we sabotage ourselves. We don't know why we feel like we're constantly off track even when we're following what we think we should be doing. We don't know why there's chronic anxiety/depression that seems to be a mainstay in our experience no matter what we do.
Today, I want to explore ONE of the factors that may be at play here - and that is the subconscious desire we all have to live up to what we believe our caregivers' expectations of us were. The subconscious ways that most of us are following the rules that our caregivers taught us without even realizing that they can be questioned, and the subconscious guilt and doubt we will have if we are going against what our caregivers taught us - even if we're going in a direction that truly DOES serve who we really are. I'm going to explore the subconscious war that is usually taking place within us - the war between doing what our caregivers modeled/expected and doing what's true for US - and why this is actually SO HARD to break out of - no matter how old or independent we get.
Those core teachings of how life works that we got from our caregivers go deep, and it takes real conscious effort to live a life outside of those dictates.
Let's explore today where you may be living to prove your parents right even as you attempt to live your own authentic life and why you may have blocks you can't seem to explain or overcome.
<3
